Freaky Fruits

So, today, totally randomly, each teacher got given two massive bags of fruit. We were told we'd be getting oranges. I like oranges.

God knows what the hell these are though. They look like enormous mutant lemons.

I'm thinking maybe grapefruit. I hope not. I don't like grapefruit. Can anyone enlighten me?

I just don't know why though. Is there a surplus of mutant lemons in China right now? Did the bottom fall out of the mutant lemon market? They can't have fallen off the back of a lorry cos it took a lorry to deliver them here! They better have been free. I for one would have appreciated more glass in the windows rather than 50kg of bizarre fruit.

I know they say 'never look a gift-horse in the mouth' but seriously... I mean I haven't even been able to try one yet, not possessing a kitchen nor any kind of kitchen utensils besides an emergency pair of chopsticks. I just don't know what to do with them!

The best examples though of these kind of totally mad and misguided thought processes have to be our Christmas presents. On the day before we left for our holiday, our foreign affairs officer, the communist party leader for the school and the man in charge of finance came over and presented us each with a Christmas present from the school, all wrapped up nicely with bows. We were quite nicely surprised. We were even more surprised when we took them home and unwrapped them.
No word of a lie. This was my Christmas present.

Honestly.

I know it's the thought that counts... but that's precisely what worries me.